In the 24/7 news cycle world, it can be easy to fall into the trap of expecting results immediately. Whether you are trying to lose weight, build a stronger relationship with your partner, or improve your grades at school, we’re constantly under pressure to achieve near immediate results. But that crushing pressure can lead to stress, and that stress can stop us from reaching our goals altogether. We need to learn how to be kind to ourselves, so that the stress and pressure doesn’t bare down on us at impossible levels. Being kind to yourself doesn’t mean to give up on your goals or to take things easy. It means that if you come up short or aren’t moving as quickly as you’d like, you don’t beat yourself up. It means that you take a deep breathe, remain calm, and figure out if you need to recalibrate to reach your goal instead of panicking or becoming extremely frustrated. Learning to be kind to yourself is a skill, and it takes time to develop it just like any other skill you might have. Here are some ways you can learn to be kind to yourself this year.
Understand We All Make Mistakes And Have Fears
Oftentimes we get frustrated with ourselves for making mistakes or being afraid. We need to understand that it is okay to have fears and make missteps—everyone does it. Fears are natural, and they can be overcome. Mistakes can teach us the lessons that we need to learn to succeed in the future. Be kind to yourself the next time you make a mistake, and treat it as a lesson instead of a punishment.
Don’t Let Your Inner Voice Crush Your Hopes
Has your inner voice ever told you that you couldn’t do something? Have you ever heard the voices of your detractors (be it classmates or co-workers) who told you to give up? Don’t listen. Instead of dwelling on negativity and fears, focus on hope and inspiration. Whenever your inner voice makes you feel that you can’t achieve your goal, do something that inspires you and makes you feel like you can take on the world.
Being Kind To Others Helps You Be Kind To Yourself
Like we talked about earlier, being kind to yourself is a skill. It isn’t something that most people are automatically good at. If you aren’t good at being kind to yourself yet, don’t fret! You can practice by being kind to others. When someone makes a mistake at your job, don’t berate them in public or laugh behind their back in private. Instead, work with them to help them understand where they went wrong and steer them in the right direction. Make sure that they understand that the mistake doesn’t define them as a person and that they have advocates in their corner. Now the next time you make a mistake, you can do that exact same thing for yourself.
Regina Fasold is a seasoned Executive Coach and Leadership Expert. Her extensive professional background and her 10+ years of experience as a Global Executive Coach have allowed her to assist over 300 senior executives in corporations throughout the United States and in over 25 countries around the world.